A Poem by terrygodwin


Author: terrygodwin
Created: August 03, 2011 at 02:27 pm
Upload Type: Poem, G (All)  
Category: General/Other | General/Other | General/Other
Upload Stats: 4.5 Stars by 1 users with 1 comments and 214 views

I look over my shoulder  

I look over my shoulder.......

I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
A fascinating world full of diversity.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
Children making sand castles on the seashore with glee.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
The beauty and fragrance of a blossoming fruit tree.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
Canadian Geese flying in their formation—the famous Vee.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
The joy of hungry children being told it is time for tea.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
Good gracious, it is a police car chasing me.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
My two little daughters claiming innocence when as guilty as can be.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
A burglar in my house who found my lost key.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
So many innocents falsely locked up when they should be free.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
Children playing in the garden as happy as can be.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
A young man proposing passionately on bended knee.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
Yachts sailing in the breeze on the River Dee.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
The happiness in a woman’s face when on a spending spree.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
A Scottish lass seeking a mate whether tall or wee.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
A pod of dolphins leaping and dancing in the sea.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
The flowers of the world being pollinated by the busy bee.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
In the sky I spy brilliant white clouds floating proud and free.
I look over my shoulder and what do I see,
Such a galaxy of beauty, how it all came about is still a mystery
With my aching neck I shall rest now and enjoy cake and tea.




© terrygodwin - all rights reserved

Author Notes


When you look at life as it happens, as it is, as it was, how did it all come to be, to me i just accept this marvelous world . This poem is just a tiny fraction of what goes on in my limited touch of life and its surrounds. I could no doubt extended, but then everyone would have gone home. hope you like this one


 
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Comments & Reviews



imprisonedbeauty
August 07, 2011
Helpful? Thumbs UpThumbs Down
brilliant (:
The structure and rhythm are amazing, love the way all the lines end with the same sound. The repetition of the line "I look over my shoulder and what do I see " is exactly what creates a continuity and extensiveness that a poem on this topic requires. The only thing that bothered me just a bit was a couple of lines having more syllables than others, which breaks the rhythm, but as the rhythm structure isn't hugely strict anyways it's not a problem. There are some very beautiful images there but also mixed with humour; the guilty girls claiming innocence and the police car chasing(love it!). This is what life's about, and the poem's persona has a wonderful attitude towards it. The ending is wonderful; deciding it's all still a mystery and the aching neck from all the looking over the shoulder!

Great job!



(Author)
Thank you for your kind comments.It is not perfect, but I hope it is entertaining.

 terrygodwin replied on August 10, 2011




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