A Poem by richom

Author: richom
Created: April 21, 2017 at 07:47 am
Upload Type: Poem, T (13+)  
Category: Relationships | Sports & Fitness | General/Other
Upload Stats: 7 comments and 238 views

Playing Partners

She swings a driver like a pro,
But balls in wrong direction go.
In creeks and lakes we see them splash.
We lose the balls and bets and cash.

On tennis courts she swings too hard.
The balls hit nets and neighbor's yard.
We lose, but she says, "What the heck.
We're having fun.  Just write the check."

Our bridge opponents think we're chumps.
On tricks I'd win, she wastes her trumps.
She can't remember what's been played,
And ace of spades makes her afraid.

She also knows not what it's like
On bowling lanes to roll a strike.
And pitching horseshoes is a joke.
Her errant tosses leave us broke.

When throwing darts or shooting pool,
Her awful aiming, as a rule,
Is why we never win a prize
And other husbands sympathize.

Our games begin and end the same.
We lose, and always she's to blame.
If all agreed to partners switch,
Perhaps I'd win and soon  be rich.

But this she firmly won't allow.
And nor would I, since I did vow, 
That, win or lose, until I'm dead
I'll stand beside this lass I've wed. 

© richom - all rights reserved

Author Notes

Almost entirely fictional for entertainment purposes.  We both have our strengths and weaknesses.  She is better at darts and bowling, and I at bridge and golf.   And we never play for money.

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Comments & Reviews ( X 15)

April 24, 2017
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Fictional or not, Richard, this is certainly entertaining. And you roll lots of "strikes" with this piece and others like it.

There are no comments on this review.

April 22, 2017
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This was a wonderful write! I never enjoyed playing golf with women, the different tee's and farting ;loudly is looked on with a snarling gaze. Cigars and beer not allowed and it's too cold or a stop at every port a potty. I'll stick with my mates.

Don't tell my wife, but I also would rather play with my buddies.
Thanks for reviewing.

 richom replied on April 23, 2017

April 22, 2017
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What the heck...
...she's having fun! Good luck to you. Seems you have chosen a 'fun gal' Life though full of ups and downs its one heck of a fun ride!

Thank you, Kitty.  I've been extremely fortunate to have met her, more than I deserve.

 richom replied on April 23, 2017

Hold on tight ,my friend ..with both hands. Good ones are hard to come by! ( In this day and age!)

 kitty replied on April 23, 2017

April 22, 2017
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Women always win
I see that you say "entirely fictional" Richard but there is more than an element of truth in it. Women will always win, maybe not in sport but definitely in every other competitive action! A very good combination of activities and excellent rhyming (as always) Looking forward to the next play-off old Mate. Take care and keep your eye on the ball !! Rod.

Thank you, Rod.  This may sound sloppily sentimental (maybe I've had too many whiskeys), but I did win one time, and it was a biggie.  I won when she married me instead of some other ne'er-do-well.
Starting with baseball when a boy, basketball as a teen and beyond, then tennis, and now golf and the highballs in my glass, I think my eye has been on some sort of ball most of my life.

 richom replied on April 22, 2017

April 22, 2017
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And You shouldn't play for money, unless it is for fun lol, those things which make the married life more sweeter, more alive, to kill the boredom of routine, again such an enjoyable write to read, I hope You and Your wife do have fun playing sports.

Thank you for the review.  The best, most fortunate thing that has happened to me in my eighty-plus years was marrying a woman who is not only loving, beautiful, kind, and brilliant, but also loves sports nearly as much as I do. 

 richom replied on April 22, 2017

April 21, 2017
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Love the humor brilliant. Love your vows.

There are no comments on this review.

April 21, 2017
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Great piece this - Excellent rhythm and flow with a humorous touch as well. Unique subject matter as well - the kind of piece you wouldn't come across very often. S/L for this one. I really did enjoy this.

There are no comments on this review.

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